Tuesday, June 29, 2010
I'm just disappointed with what i get.
Another bad result.
Seriously i'm in the verge of breaking down
I dont want to do this anymore
I'm trying very hard to hold on but i think it's going to snap soon
I cant work under pressure and i dont think anyone can too.
It just so hard.
I feel so disheartened when i saw the result. Ok i know how to do and i'm confident that i can get better result but in the end..
My hopes are just dash.
Putting my heart and soul in studying but in the end didnt get what i want.
Am i expecting too much of myself?
Now i realised that maybe i'm not up to the standard yet and i cant fight with the rest of them
It just over then...
| Breaking Down 9:07:00 PM
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Monday, June 28, 2010
School reopen today
Haix so bored
Stare and stone during the lecture
Eyes feel so heavy. Luckily didnt dose off.
Get back result for effective comm and i expect that result
What ever i dont care anymore
Not that disppointed as i know i did my best and she dont seem care about me
So yea stroll my day
| Breaking Down 8:53:00 PM
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Thursday, June 24, 2010
Just now went to Yishun to meet with Mardhiah after going for the hygiene course practical test.
Eating dinner and off we went to watch Letters to Juliet
Funny part
I fall at the 1st stairs and then the last stairs
So clumsy of redha.
Then when we went in the show has 'ended'. We thought we went into the wrong theatre but we continue finding our seat. Hahahaha so cute of us
It's about a girl called Sophia who meet with this lady who pick up letters from the wall which was written by the girls who got problems with their relationship.
She found a old letter hidden inside the bricks written by Clare who run away from her boyfriend 50 years ago and now she want to find him..
Sophia help Clare to find her soulmate..
Want to know what happen next ...
Go watch yourself
Meet Ate half way through my hygiene test. =]
Got to go
| Breaking Down 10:22:00 PM
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Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Today went to the food hygiene course. Was super boring!!!!!!!!
Too much thoery. There so many types of bacterias that i need to remember and i think i cant remember all..Hahaha
Some that i can remember is the Salmonella or something.
Yeah so quite interesting anyway.
Reminds me of Food And Nutrition in secondary school where i need to remember all the nurients. Now i understand the theory part of studying all this. It's useful not in the short term but in the long run.
Took the written test at the end of the lecture and i think i did ok. Not confident get the whole thing correct but then..
Thinking about what had happened the past few days, i think it's time for me to let it go and move on with my life.
Maybe it's make me more happy when not thinking about it anymore
It's my fate!!!!
It's ok !!!!!
It will make me stronger
Focus and concentrate with my studies will be much worth my time
Choows!!!!!!
| Breaking Down 6:33:00 PM
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Monday, June 21, 2010
I feel sooo tired this few days. dont know why maybe due to long hours of standing.
Lately i'm not who i used to be
Knowing that 'special someone' has been taken
It just break my heart.
den again just soooo stupid to play with all this feelings
Maybe we are not meant to be
Here i am stuck at home doing nothing
trying to concentrate doing my tutorial end up sleeping again. argh!!!!
Wake up redha!!!!!!!!!!
Now feeling that going to be sick
getting flu and throat feel the pain
Maybe due to lack of rest
6 more days to go before school reopen.
Dont feel like going to school now
| Breaking Down 7:59:00 PM
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Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Haix cant stay at home for long.
Maybe get to use to be out almost everyday.
Yesterday went out to celebrate my girlfriend's birthday. the meet up actually was at City hall but in the end we went all the way to Tampines. ahaha
1st stop meet Roshini and Devi at City Hall . Went for lunch at Burger King
Trying my luck and went to meet Ate..
Aww how much i miss ate. Feel like hugging her but i cant.
I feel so pity for her. Just wish that i can replace her and help instead. feel so helpless.
After finish eating off we go playing arcade while waiting for Azhura to reply.
Went to Century square and watch Furry Vengeance. Not bad. funny but it cant beat the Karate Kid. That show was awesome man !!!
Feel like watching again.
So today i'm stuck at home. trying to study but in the end i fall asleep..
Argh!!!
Feeling weird lately. I dont know why.. =[
| Breaking Down 6:54:00 PM
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Thursday, June 10, 2010
I have fallen deep down inside
I cant find the way through.
I dont have the strength to stand up.
I need a helping ears and hands but nobody was there.
They wont understand and they will not understand what I'm going through.
I'm just wanna reflect what i have done.
After yesterday and today's result i think i should start waking up now before it's too late.
I dont wanna hurt them who has been supporting me from the start of my journey.
I know i'm not perfect and I dont wanna be perfect either.
But it just pain..
I cant bear to go on this forever as i'm not strong enough to face the obstacles all by myself.
I shouldnt compare with my classmates as it just add to my burden and my stress
I dont wanna care about other people since they dont even care about me.
I jus wanna be who i am and be happy with who i am.
i wanna be the old redha who is cheerful, crazy, smart and more confidence in herself and believe that she can do it..
Not the new redha who is lazy and heck care with study upon reminders and reminders.
I have made up mind to do my best abilities and not compare with other people
I should happy for now that i can take a break after a long time of suffering
It's ok Redha. I know Redha can do better
Cheers !!!!!!!!!!!!
| Breaking Down 3:27:00 PM
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Monday, June 7, 2010
Today my 2nd presentation. Hiax dont think did well.
I think better than the 1st. (hopefully)
Holidays coming up soon
Horray!!! I cant wait to take a break but then must go through 1 more ICA before i can go for my break.
Haven break got so many plans already.. meeting all my friends
Miss yea so much
And yea going to meet Ate too..
You know what?
I dont feel the sense of belonging in school compare to last time
Even my tutors dont even recongnise me. Never ask to recognise la. They dont even know my name. Haix
Who am i?
Yea i know i'm just a lousy student there compare to the rest of my friends
Now i dont care anymore.
I am who i am.
If you hate me so be it
| Breaking Down 9:06:00 PM
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Saturday, June 5, 2010
Haix. sacrifice my sleep to do the stupid speech outline
sian na. What to do? Cant slack already
I think i 'fly' too much paper already and i need to stop that.
Need to focus liao.
Thinking of that makes me scared and more stress.
That's why i force myself this morning to wake up and do my work.
1 more week before it's holiday.
Holiday?
I think i need to start to revise and do my project.
Argh!!!!
Miss Ate but then i cant meet her for now
| Breaking Down 7:45:00 AM
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Thursday, June 3, 2010
It seems that i'm rushing for time.
I just dont have time to study, watch Tv or even to spent time with my friends
What a bad time management i had?
Two ICA i have successfully done. I think i did ok.
Now more ICA coming and i dont know how to handle it.
It just so different compare to last time.
Ok Redha stop comparing and start doing your job.
Remember what i had promise myself.
Not to let anyone down right?
So get up and move on Redha !!!
| Breaking Down 9:15:00 PM
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